Knock OUT!!!

I have come to expect and actually cherish the adorable little "gifts" the munchkins leave on my Mac.  Well, sorta.  

Today I found a plethora of images of JP doing only heaven-knows-what in Photo Booth.  I might not have found these little beauties if it hadn't been for Brian.  He was in the process of filming a video of him "beating JP up".  I have graciously included both the multitude of stills of JP and Brian's video:

Is this thing on??

Wait, you have a little something on your nose...

I have no clue what was going on in this one...

Oh, no!  Double Trouble!

AHHHHH! Now there's three of him!

This is how I see JP after a day like today- all twisted and swirly!

The Crimson Chin! Minus the crimson, of course.

This is JP after the head shrinkers finally caught up with him!

The Hulk after his skin bleaching...

As you can see, it wasn't JP who was knocked out, but Brian.  He wore himself out trying to demolish JP's image.  Maybe I should have told him it was just a picture of JP, not ACTUALLY JP, but it was much more fun to watch him do this.  I'm SURE there will be many more antics to report on tomorrow, so for now...

Pony in a Tree

Today, John Paul decided to "prove" to us that he can sing opera.  I wasn't aware that we were in disbelief, but still, he needed to show us that he could.  WARNING:  This could get ANNOYING!!!

So- without further ado- It is my privilege to present John Paul sining "Pony in a Tree":

I didn't know that this opera existed.  He says it's his own composition, that part is easy to believe.  In case you couldn't figure it out, he's singing the same line over and over, and over, and over again.  That line is, "O little pony, who lives in a tree!"  He says it's because that's what opera singers do.  I was surprised by how well he actually did!  I have to admit that it does begin to sound a little like fingernails being scratched down a chalkboard, but I had to share it with you all.  My favorite part is how committed he is to the bit!  That and his "emotion" and his gestures!  Too funny! He didn't have to be prompted at all, he just stood up and announced that he could sing opera.  

That's all for now.  I believe that I have witnessed what my time in Purgatory will be like.  May God have pity on me!

Be good and God bless!

This Summer's Hottest Thriller!!!:

SNAKES IN A CLOSET! (Dun-Dun-Dun!!!)

Coming soon to a theater near you!

In this summer's hottest thriller, "Snakes in a Closet", the prequel to "Snakes on a Plane" is unleashed on sleepy, unsuspecting suburbia! Staring Colette Williams as herself; the movie opens with our heroine stumbling upon a deadly reptile poised to strike her down as she reaches into a linen closet for a beach towel. Dr. Chris, and the Williams' brothers rush to her rescue after receiving her frantic call for help!

OK- so here is the story. Friday, Colette and a friend decided to head to the beach, so she went to the linen closet in the downstairs bathroom, when I hear her yelling, "OH my GOODNESS! Oh My!" I asked what her problem was, and she's barely able to squeak out that "there's a S, S, SN, SNAKE in the closet!" I didn't even believe her at first. Then I saw her face and had to believe her! After we secured the premises, (see above picture) I did question her in depth about what it looked like, and made SURE it wasn't a lizard, or a fake snake. She assured me it moved, and I got what I believed to be an accurate description of the intruder: big and brown with a little yellowish on it. OK, so the description was a little shaky, but I was pretty sure it WAS A snake so I called MY dad to see what he thought it might be. First he was a smart alec and said he definitely thought it was a snake. Well, DUH! Then he wanted to know if I had seen it. HECK NO! You really think that I would willingly go into a small confined space with a reptile of unknown deadliness??? He didn't think it was poisonous, so I relaxed a little, but not Colette. She was perched on top of the piano bench clinging to her friend, Emily, both of them quivering in fear. She was screaming, "Get it out! Get the snake out -of- the- house!" For some strange reason she thought I was going in there and removing the snake, MYSELF. She must have been delirious from the shock, but there was no way I was going anywhere near that thing!

So I told her to call her dad. She was hysterical! Screaming into the phone that he had to come home RIGHT NOW! That there was a HUGE SNAKE IN THE BATHROOM! I tried to get her to calm down so that he could understand her, but I wound up having to wrestle the phone from her and tell him the story. That's when he asks me, "Have you seen the snake?" What is with all these crazy people wanting me to close myself up in a bathroom with a snake?! What makes them think that is something that I would do? Anyway, Chris was on his way back to the house, and he would take care of "it".

When he got there the kids rushed in before him announcing, "Never here the Snake Hunters are here!"

The first thing they did was press their ears to the door. I asked what they were doing. "Can you hear anything?", one hunter asked the others. "Nope, how about you?", was one's reply. So- they decided to knock, but surprisingly... the the snake did not answer them. "I think he's ignoring us.", the third one stated. So they headed off, I think to find more exciting things to occupy their attention. Meanwhile, Colette and her friend are still on top of the piano bench, and Chris starts bringing in shovels, yes, that's plural, as in more than one. I never have figured out why he needed more than one shovel, but hey, he was the one dealing with the deadly rattler. That's what this snake had grown into; a big, fat rattle snake, coiled and ready to strike at the next person to come in that bathroom. Remember, Colette is still the only one to have seen this snake, so we really had no idea what was in there, so it COULD have very well been a deadly creature of mass destruction. By now both Monica AND I had realized that we had gone into the same closet just minutes before Colette, and not seen this monster. Strange to think that we missed it!

Chris disappeared outside through one of the many doors that had been propped open. I was told by the Snake Hunters that these were to give the giant killer escape routes, should he get out from his confinement. When I turned back to the door I found this:

The boys had returned with Air Soft guns, locked, loaded, and trained on the door. Just waiting for some sign of movement. "Did you see something move?" "Nope, did you?" "Nope, keep watching, though." After a few seconds of a lot of NOTHING happening they decided to be brave and go in after it.
JP: "Open the door, Grant."
Grant: "I'm not opening that door! You open it!"
JP: "Just open the door, don't be a wuss!"
Grant: " NO! You open the door."
JP: "Fine. Brian. Open the door."
Brian: " Uh-uh. NO WAY! You open the door if you want it opened so badly!"
JP: "Jeez! You guys are wimps! Shannon, open the door on three!"
ME: "You are nuts! And none of you are opening that door. So just chill, and back away from the door!"



So they took off to find something else to use as target practice, or so I assumed. About this time Chris tells that he has a "professional" on the way, and that he should be here soon. Celine decides to be the lookout, and announces "He's here! He's here!" about every 30 seconds or so. When the guy does show, he looked to be as old as Moses, and came armed with an empty box that once held kitty litter, and a couple of long poles with grabby claws on the end. Without missing a beat, the "Snake Charmer" guy, who was obviously over 80 years old, tries to open the bathroom door, but- it was locked. Colette had locked the door as she fled the bathroom! Why? I have no clue. It's not like the thing had opposable thumbs, jeez! After we got the door unlocked the gentleman quickly caught the monster, which turned out to be not so monstrous. In fact, it was a Gardner snake. a SMALL, THIN, GREEN snake with YELLOW STRIPES along its sides. Oh, and it was about a foot and half long. Some monster, huh? The "Snake Charmer" put the little guy in his bucket and carted him off to be released in the woods.

This has led to untold numbers of snake references, jokes, and pranks. I brought a bag of fake snakes and hid them on or in each of their desks. They found them one by one, and none of them were really frightened by them, they just thought that they were funny. Brian had fun pretending that his was real, and stalking him while he worked.









OK, so that is the snake story. Sorry that there wasn't more of a dramatic end, or even pictures of the little fellow. It all happened so quickly that I couldn't get one. It is interesting though, that latter that evening we were sitting by the pool when a large black snake slithered onto the deck. THIS one I did see, and he was pretty big. No exaggeration! I have no idea what type he was, but the kids did get a few shots with the Air Soft guns in. Grant hit him twice, but don't fear all you animal lovers out there, he was unhurt, just spooked. It obviously didn't scare him too badly, though, because he came back about five minutes later. UH! (**Shivers!**)


Be good and God bless!

The importance of proper pronunciation...

This time change is on the verge of rendering me useless. I was amazed to learn that some countries actually don't participate in Daylight Savings, and so, I have decided that I am going to stop observing it myself! Who cares if I'm the only one in the Free World who does. At least maybe I won't be so groggy!

I think we are all feeling the loss of Saturday's hour of sleep. John Paul tells me today that, "Baptism is a snackrament that gives us the life of grace and make us children of God." Hmmm. A Snackrament? Not gonna touch that one. And then Grant just told us that Bishop Newman wanted to be able to speak to a young girl in her native "garlic". Now he was supposed to read "Gaelic", but added a "r" to it and so for the past 10 minutes we have been discussing "garlic" vs. "Gaelic", and name origins and meanings. Turns out that Grant, Meg, and my own name are all "garlic" in origin. WAIT! News flash! Meg just found out that her beloved name, which she has thought was Gaelic until this very moment, is in FACT- WELSH! Sorry, Meg, guess you aren't as "garlic" as you thought. It's OK, though, just go eat at Al's and you'll be VERY garlic-y! Well, at least your breath will be.

OK, enough.

Be good and God bless!

I love "LOVE"!

I had a wonderful St. Valentine's Day yesterday! Between the kids and my friends and my- OH!!! Yesterday my parents sent me a sweet surprise. Remember how I was telling you how they always did something to make the day special for us? Well, yesterday around 4:30PM the doorbell rang at the William's house and JP answered the door. He comes into the room announcing: "Flowers for Shannon the nanny! Shannon the nanny, I have a flower delivery for a Shannon the nanny!" I thought he was kidding around, he does that sometimes, you know, kid around? Well, sure enough he had an adorable bouquet of flowers for me from my Mom and Dad! How incredibly sweet! Aw, shucks! I feel loved!!





Here are the little beauties:

Cute, huh? Well, the kids were impressed. And I was thrilled! Thanks Mom and Dad! I love you both, too! OK, back to the dinner...Meghan had a wonderful candle lit dinner at her house for several of her friends who happened to find themselves single this Valentine's day. Um, that would seem to include me, so she included me. Oh, and Yvette. We had delicious Salmon and new potatoes, (Thanks for not serving the old rotten ones, Meg! That was really thoughtful of ya!) I brought a simple salad to share. Afterwards there was CHOCOLATE FONDUE! OH, MY GOODNESS! Have I mentioned how much I love chocolate? And we all played a rousing game or two of Catch Phrase. (Metacarpal, epidermis! Something you water your plants with.... um, water?) OK, so it wasn't Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca, but it was a great time and the perfect alternative to sitting around moping about not having a sweetie! Thanks to Meg for a great time! It was one of my favorite Valentine's Days!

Gonna go get some work done!

God bless and BE GOOD!

Happy St. Valentine's Day!

Happy St. Valentine's Day!!!

Well, today is a day for lovers and mushy love stuff, right? OK, it is for those things, but I have a broader understanding of this Holiday. My Mom always told my sister and I that she was our FIRST Valentine, and like all things, she made this day very special. She always had a card and some small gift to mark the day. It could be flowers, or a heart shaped box of candy. Ore year she had matching heart shaped anklets engraved with our names on them for Katie and I. Even as we grew older she and Dad always did something extra to show how much they loved us. Now, we already knew this fact, but it has made for wonderful loving memories that I hope to one day pass onto my children. I delight in doing much the same as my Mom did back then, to be able to present some small offering to those I love and care for, even if it's a silly little trinket, at least they know that I thought especially of them today. Thanks you Mom and Dad for teaching what it means to love, and it's more important to show someone that you love them EVERY day than just on a special day. I LOVE YOU!!







The Williams' Kids made today very special as well. They make cards for Meg and I, and gave us some very cute stationary sets. John Paul even BOUGHT us cards and drew us lovely pictures of Cupid shooting us and our "men".





Regardless of whether or not I have a "significant other" in my life at this moment, I know that I am Deeply Loved. I pray that today as well as each day that you may know the Love of Him who loved you FIRST and PERFECTLY. And know that I love you, too!



God bless and Be GOOD!




PS. I'm told that the "SB" in the hearts in the first picture stands for "somebody" and the "SN" is my initials. That JP is a Cutie-Pie!

Last nerve...

I have never considered myself a font of patience. I mean, I can tolerate only so much before I SNAP!!! Today was one of those days where the font ran dry rather quickly, leaving me little choice but to become the meanie that shouts and yells, " Cut it out, or I'm gonna whack ya!" They know I'm only joking, so it really does little more than make me feel better, and leave them thinking that I need anger management classes! I could be writing about all the LOVE and the sweet things the kids did today to mark this day of HEARTS, and I will in a moment, but first let me explain the psychotic meltdown that occurred only moments ago...

In the spirit of the holiday that is St. Valentine's Day, Donna had a BUCKET of candy waiting on the kids this morning. AWWW, how sweet! Right? WRONG!! These munchkins have been OUT OF CONTROL!!! In as much as these kids can be out of control, I mean, nothing has been burned beyond recognition, or anything, but the yelling and wrestling, and incessant chatter all while we are trying to learn has been, well, MADDENING! One can only say, "Please be quiet, children" in a sicky sweet voice a couple of hundred times before the voice becomes not so sweet! Well, in the midst of this chaos, Chris, their father calls home to check on the kiddies. I answered the phone, "Williams' Mad House, Shannon Speaking." Well, that threw the kids into hysterics, so much so that I had to flee to another room and barricade myself within, just to be able to have an adult conversation with my boss and find out what his plans were for his lunch with the kids. Of course a few locked doors did not deter the sugar induced high! No, the kids continued to bang on the doors demanding to be let in and to talk to their dad. But my time in the gym paid off! I was able to hold them at bay long enough to finish our conversation. Yeah, ME!

Once I returned to the school room, and Meghan and I restored order. We all got back to the business of learning. Or, so I thought. Just as things were grooving along, Chris called again to let me know that the plans we had made had changed slightly. In mid sentence, I hear this loud POP, and the pinging of what I came to discover was thousands of KIDNEY BEANS! As I turned to see what was going on, there sat Brian with a busted Ziploc bag, a bag that HAD been filled with our Counting Beans, which were now scattered all over the floor! Here is a little video of the aftermath...




And the Clean up efforts:



It really only took about 10 minutes for him to clean them all up. But it felt like 30 to him!


One final note: As I finish typing this Grant is in the background saying : "I'm done."
Meghan corrects him, "Finished."
Grant: "No I'm done with spelling."
Meghan: "No, you are finished. Cakes are done, people are finished."
Grant: "That's what I said!"
Meghan: "It is NOT what you said. Use proper English!"



And minutes latter she had the SAME conversation with John Paul! Maddening, I say! MADDENING!

God bless and be good!

OH- and use proper ENGLISH!